Turning Dreams Into Reality....

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Encouragement

Something We All Need
Encouragement changes everything, as you encourage others, you encourage yourself.

I was sent this from Monday Motivation.... This week we share a message from John Maxwell about what an important tool encouragement is and how we can use it to truly influence the lives of those around us.

Several times in my life, I have wanted to stop, but words or deeds of encouragement have kept my going.  George Adams said, "There are high spots in all of our lives, and most of them have come about through encouragement from someone else."

Years ago, an experiement was conducted to measure people's capacity to endure pain.  The test was to see how long a barefooted person could stand in a bucket of ice water.  It was discovered that when there was someone else present offering encouragement and support, the person standing in the ice water could tolerate pain twice as when no one when was present.  Again, encouragement keeps us going, no matter the adversity that faces us.

Encouragement Makes People Better
To further illustrate the power of encouragement, I would like to share with you an experiment performed some time ago in the San Francisco school system.  A principal in the district called in three teachers and told them that, because of their expertise, they were considered the finest teachers in the system.  He also told them they would be given 90 high-IQ students who would be allowed to learn at their own pace to see how far they could advance.

At the end of the year, these students achieved 20 to 30 percent more than other students in the entire San Francisco Bay area.  The principal called the three teachers in and told them he had a confession to make.  He told them they didn't have 90 of the most intellectually gifted students.  In fact, academically, they were run-of-the-mill, average students picked at ramdom.  The teachers concluded their exceptional teaching skills must have been responsible for the students' great progess.  But the principal had another confession to divulge.  These teachers were the first three names grawn out of a hat.

Why, then, did these students and teachers perform at such an exceptional level for the entire year?  They were encouraged to believe that they could.  Psychologists say that, deep down, all people have certain desires in common.  If you want to encourage people, help them fulfill these most basic, heartfelt desires.

People want to:
  • do the right thing.... Stand with them
  • find better ways of doing things...Empower them
  • achieve things they can be proud of....Motivate them
  • belong to a group that achieves the extraordinary...Invite them
  • earn recognition for who they are and what they achieve....Honor them
Encouragement Turns Lives Around.  Encouragement is deciding to make your problem my problem.

I would like to share with you a wonderful story I read in A 2nd Helping of Chicken Soup for the Soul.  The author of the story, Dan Clark, recalls when, as a teenager, he and his father stood in line to buy tickets for the circus.  As they waited, they noticed a family immediately in front of them.  The parents were holding hands and had eight children in tow, all under the age of 12.  Baswed on their clean, but simple clothing, Clark suspected they didn't have a lot of money.  The kids chattered about the exciting things they were expecting to see, and he could tell the circus was going to be a new adventure for them.

As the couple approached the counter, the attendant quoted the price for the entire family.  The woman let go of her husband's ahnd, and her head dropped.  The man leaned a little closer and asked, "How much did you say?"  The attendant again quoted the price, the man obviously didn't have enough money.  He looked crushed Clark says that his father, who was watching all of this play out, put his hand in his pocket and pulled out a $20 bill and dropped it on the ground.  His father then reached down, picked up the bill, tapped the man on the shoulder and said, "Excuse me, sir, this fell out of your pocket."  The man knew exactly what was goin gon, and he looked straight into Clark's father's eyes, took his hand, shook it and, with tears streaming down his cheeks, replied, "Thank you, thank you, sir.  This really means a lot to me and my family."

Clark and his father went back to the car and drove home.  They didn't have enough money to go to the circus that night.  But it didn't matter.  It encouraged the whole family.  And it was something neither family would ever forget.

Encouragement Gives Hope
My wife, Margaret, and I love to visit presidential libraries and museums.  While most people are in and out, we take our time.  I usually take a notebook and will come out with anywhere from six to a dozen lessons on leadership.

At the Smithsonian Institute in Washington, DC, they had some of the personal articles Abraham Lincoln had with him the night he was assassinated at the Ford Theatre on display.  Among those listed, there was a Confederate $5 bill worn-out newspaper article that extolled Lincoln's accomplishments as president.  The article starts out, "Abe Lincoln is one of the greatest statesmen of all time."

Isn't it interesting that the president of the United States, the most powerful man in the free world, woudl be walking around with a worn-out newspaper clipping in his pocket from somebody who was giving him praise?  If you are a student of Lincoln, it makes sense.  He was never really appreciated until after his death.  But here he is, hanging on to one man's opinion saying he was doing a good job.

Everybody Needs Somebody
None of us achieve anything without the help of somebody else.  In fact, some of the greatest discoveries and achievements in history happened because these people were encouraged bu others.  Authors CS Lewis and JRR Tolkien maintained a close friendship throughout their careers, sharing their love of mythical stories and a desire to create those stories for the public.  It was Tolkien who lef Lewis to Christianity, and it was Lewis who encouraged Tolkien to keep writing fiction.  It is said the literary world would have neither The Chronicles of Narnia nor The Lord of the Rings if not for the friendship between these two men.

One of the great things about encouragement is that you don't have to be brilliant to encourage people, you just have to have a heart for other people.  Find ways to encourage others.  Put your arm around them, and tell them how much you appreciate them.  You never know if that one good act of kindness is exactly what they need.  As you encourage others, you encourage yourself.

When giving encouragement, be sure it's earned.  And remember to keep it sincere, honest, appropriate, meaningful, balanced and specific.  Think of someone who has been an encouragement to you.  Follow their example and pay it forward to someone you know.  Don't hesitate, do it today and make a difference in someone's life. 

Have a great week unless you choose otherwise.

Friday, January 28, 2011

Stir Crazy Today!

I absolutely love working from home!  I wouldn't trade this for anything....

BUT... do you ever have days where you just feel like you're going to crawl out of your own skin?  Where you are just so ansy you aren't really sure which end is up???

That is how I am feeling today.  It doesn't happen very often... but when it does, it drives me insane.

I am a home-body.  I love being at home.  Just every now and again I get this overwhelming feeling like the walls are closing in on me.  I know it's my own fault.  I rarely leave the house.  I should get out and meet some local people. I should join a group... or get some sort of a hobby outside the home.  I think about doing these things... then tomorrow comes and I love being at home again...lol

Today though is just one of those days.  Maybe it's the women hormone thing...lol  That could be it.  Isn't it amazing how up and down we can be at times?  Too bad we can't really figure out exactly what it is we want... or maybe that's just me.

Working from home has allowed me to not have to go outside the home to make money... it's allowed me to be at home full time for my boys.  It's allowed me to pay the bills.  It's allowed me to keep food on the table.... etc....  But somedays I go a little stir crazy.

I've been asked in the past if there is anything negative about working from home... I guess that would be it.  Working from home means you are always at home.  90% of me says that's a GREAT thing though.  Wow... can we say I make NO sense today???

I guess we all want our cake and eat it too.... or at least I do.  Or, maybe that's not what I want.... or... maybe that's what I already have.  Do we ever really know?

One thing I know for sure is my kids are my world.  Sure, they drive me batty somedays... but isn't that their job? Think of how boring it would be if they were perfect all the time... not much excitement there!

Even though I have days like today... I still wouldn't trade it in.  I have my little insane moments every now and again... but eventually I come back down and am grounded again...lol

Now to find an outside the home group... what do I like to do outside the home?  What type of groups are available?  Hmmmmmm... suggestions?

Thursday, January 27, 2011

Going Green??

Go Green?  Why?  How?

Being in the "go green" industry for so many years, I think it's just part of who I am.  I can't tell you how many people I speak with daily who say the same thing... "I just don't know where to start.....I don't want to go store to store trying to find products to make my home environmentally friendly."

It doesn't have to be a hard thing.  There are so many small things that we can all do everyday that will make a big difference.

Look at the cleaners you have in your home.  Really look at them.  Are they safe going down your drain?  Chances are they aren't.  Manufacturers today are promoting "green, safe products"... but who can you trust?

I trusted the commercials for many years... baby shampoo being safe... spraying the disinfectant in baby's room and on baby's toys... the products are marketed to moms as being safe.  But, are they really?  How do we know?  We don't really... we need to do our own research. 

I did this research and ended up ceasing shopping from most manufacturers that spend millions of dollars to advertise their products on TV.  What are commercials for?  Well, to sell products right?  So, are all commercials giving correct information? Hmmmm.  How many times have I heard the old saying..."He's a car salesman... his job is to sell the car... he'll say whatever to sell that car..."  (no offence to car sales people!)... BUT... how is this any different than commercials??  They are actors who are getting paid to make the products seem irresistible... the script was written for them... COME ON!  Are we really that naiive to believe everything we hear/see on TV??

When we become pregnant, we want the best for our baby... the safest crib, high chair, car seat, toys, etc... But what thought goes into shampoo, body wash, bubble bath, lotion, laundry soap, cleaners we clean the home with?

We all want our homes clean with baby there... disinfect that home. 

Think about the smell... think about the fumes... think about the residue that's left on the surfaces you are cleaning.

Read the labels.  Find out what's actually in that bottle. 

So, going back to being green... it's easier than you think.  It's simply about making a decision and making it happen!

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

How do you know when to walk away?

I don't know about you, but I'm a tad controlling.  Seriously.  If I'm not in control of a situation, I feel so uncomfortable. 

Is this something that happens once we become moms?  That baby is born, and now all of a sudden we a mom, we are in control of this new being.  We feed this little person, clean him, hold him, etc...  This little person is solely relying on you to take care of their every need.

Then that baby gets older and starts showing their own independance.  What happens to us moms?  We have to step aside and let them take more and more independance.  It's scary for a mom... yet we know we have to make the transition.

As the kids get older and older, they need us less and less.  We feel the control slipping through our fingers.  We want to grab hold of it and never let go.  There's a voice inside us telling us to let go... but dang... it's hard!

So then I look at other areas of my life.  Am I compensating that control for other things?  Meaning, am I trying to take control of other things since I feel like I am losing control elsewhere?  Hmmmmm.  Maybe a little too deep when there hasn't been enough sleep...lol

Sooooo when do we know to step back.  Is there a right time?

I find myself doing quite the coaching-in-my-head talks.  To think before I speak and before I take action.  I have heard so many times, don't react.  Use the 24-hour rule... step away and let the emotion pass before "reacting".  Ok... well that's hard too.  We are only human afterall... right?

I come from a place where I never felt like i had any control.... so when I became a mom... wow!  I had control.  I really liked that feeling... but I don't know that I really understood it was control until I started losing it.  Yikes. 

So now here I am with a 14 year old who wants all the independance in the world... and a 9 year old who is approaching wanting more and more independance.  I look ahead and wonder where we'll be in 5 years... that scares me!  I will then have a 19 year old...whoa...not a good feeling.  Just breathe.....

When I started working from home I did so to be at home full time with my kids.  The boys and I are close... so even though they are getting older and taking more and more independance... we will always be close... just the dynamics of our relationship will change.

Please, don't let me be one of those overbearing mothers who feels the need to share opinions on girlfriends, etc...  Nope... that will not be me!

It's such a strange thing... being a mom... knowing what is right and what is wrong.  Part of me panics... what will I do when the boys are all grown up and out of the house.  I'll still be here working from home... but won't be a stay-at-home mom any longer.  Then I'll just be someone who works from home.  But, that's a good thing I guess.

So, what's the point.  I suppose the point is control.  How it can take over.  With it we can feel powerful, useful, respected, in charge... without it we can feel vulnerable, lost, alone... scared.  But, really, it doesn't have to be that way.  "Control" isn't only a positive thing... it can be negative as well.

I look at my team.  I don't want "control" there.  We are all equals.  We work together as a TEAM.  

Yes, I have control of my business... because it's just that... MY business.  I can control who I work with.  I can control how I conduct my business.  I can control MY actions and reactions.

One thing for sure is this... the ONE thing we will ALWAYS have control over is ourselves.  When I said, from where I come from I didn't have control... I was in a situation where I really didn't have any control.  Once leaving that situation and gaining control... it is a scary thing.  Not knowing how to make decisions.

It's all a learning process.  Life is such an interesting thing.  We all spend so much time worrying and not living in the moment.  We worry about what could happen... instead of waiting to see what will actuall happen.

So, there's my lesson to myself for today... instead of worrying about what "might" happen... I shall enjoy the beauty of today.
It's funny.  I have been working from home for so long that it seems my world completely revolves around my house.  I'm not saying that's a bad thing.... it just makes one think sometimes.

Yesterday I was at my son's hockey practice and had a great conversation with another mom.  It was different thatn what I have become accustomed to.  I have gotten so used to being in the house with my headset on.  Most of the time that headset is attached to my head all day long.  Again, not necessarily a bad thing.

There are far more positives about working from home then negatives.  For example, I am here for my kids.  I don't have to get up, shower, get in the car and commute to some job.  Working from home, my income is unlimited... whereas in a job it would very much be limited.

I have met the most incredible people working from home.  People whom I never would have met otherwise.  They have changed my life.  They had made me grow.  They have made me a better person.

I love that I can sit at home, pick up the phone and have the best people to talk to.  We laugh together, we work together, we cry together... just as though we were sitting in the same room.

My life has changed... but wow... so much for the better.  Being part of a team truly is a blessing.

Excuses, excuses, excuses....

People spend too much time finding other people to blame, too much energy finding excuses for not being what they are capable of being, and not enough energy putting themselves on the line, growing out of the past, and getting on with their lives ~~J. Michael Straczynski~~

Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Why are some businesses successful and others not so much?

First look at the company you are with.  Are they successful?  Chances are if they aren't growing, you never will either.  If the company is trhiving and you aren't, why not?

Working from home can be a tough industry.  First you have to have complete belief in what it is you are doing.  If you don't, it will shine through.  You must be partnered with a company that manufactures products that real people need, use, run out of and already have to repurchase.

If you're promoting something that's considered a "want"... chances are you will eventually run out of people who want to make the purchase.

Look for a company that is making a profit, that has a proven track record.  You want a company that has been established.  These "ground level" opportunites are scary.  It takes at least 5 years for a company to get on their feet.  Do you really want to get into a start-up company that will likely never get off the ground??

Is the company in debt?  Chances are, if they are... you likely won't be making any money.

Learn about the compensation plan.  How will you get paid.  Are there break-aways?  Can you make more money than the person who helped you get started?  Are people buying their way to the next level/status?  People get hurt and lose money... be cautious!

Research the company through reputable websites.  Remember, most of what is on the internet is opinion based.  We all have different opinions and are free to share all over the internet.... but this doesn't mean it's a correct representation of the company.  A good, reputable site is the Better Business Bureau (http://www.bbb.org/).  Find out what the company BBB rating is.  Have they had complaints?  Did the company bother to rectify any complaints?

Do your research.  Just because one person didn't have success with a certain company, doesn't mean you won't.  Everyone is different.  What is your work ethic?  Do you have credibility?  Do you have goals?  What is your reason for wanting to work from home?

Anyone can work from home... not everyone will be successful.  Anything worthwhile takes work.  There are no such thing as "get rich quick". 

Happy searching!